This blog is for the class of 1èreES-L to share digital work with each other, to view and review each other's posts. Remember: Respect yourselves and each other and have fun!
Monday, March 7, 2016
Written expression : imagination
Henri Thompson is a young boy of 10 years old. He is Irish but he lives in Cambridge, in England because his parents found a bigger house than the preceding house in Ireland. He lives with his mother and his father in a big house with a swimming pool in a garden. He has a little sister and an older sister too. His family is rich because his father works in a bank. His mother is a housewife so she stays in her house everyday. Henri is a beautiful boy. He has curly browned hair and green eyes. He is tall for his age and very sporty. He plays football and he boxes. When he was 7 years old, Henri was a very good boy, he helped his mother with cooking and cleaning the house. But when he was 9 years old, his dog Snoopy died. Ever, the young boy has been rebellious and cheeky. He doesn't help his mother anymore and he stays in his room everyday to play video games. He has the biggest room of the house because he needs to feel better than the other people of the family. His room is not stored because he is a messy boy. He eats more and more everyday and he is getting bigger and bigger.
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Hello !
ReplyDeleteYour work is very funny !
I think this is a good idea to speak about the progression of a little boy. Your vocabulary is really good, but you should say "handsome" and not "beautiful", because it's too effeminate... Your "story" is good enough, but I don't understand why Henri become rebellious and cheeky just because his dog died... This is kinf of weird. But, except it, this is alright :)
Hi
DeleteI think your work is very nice and structure. You begin by introducing the Henri's life (His Family, his house) and after a descritpion more focus on his character (his hobbies, his character before and after the tragic accident).
The vocabulary is varied and rich, and you use a lot of word studied in class.
Good job
Hi,
ReplyDeleteWell, your character doesn't have a good life since the death of his dog. Poor Henry. Except this, the description is very interesting. You show us the evolution of your character, how he looks like, and how his life changed so suddenly. You often repeat "his" or "he", but except this, the structure is alright. Congrats!
Hi,
ReplyDeleteYour story is kind of funny and sad at the same time, although you are treating a serious matter, an issue in this story and I think it is very captivating.
You show us that when you lose your pet, it can be very impactful on the owner's life.
Hi,
ReplyDeleteYour story is kind of funny and sad at the same time, although you are treating a serious matter, an issue in this story and I think it is very captivating.
You show us that when you lose your pet, it can be very impactful on the owner's life.
Joanie : your story is great, at the beginning we have a child happy, intelligent and very interesting but he just had an unfortunate incident happens that his life changes overnight. your story is captivating, good job eva.
ReplyDelete